Forgiveness 

Learning how to forgive is important because you won’t always be the victim. there won’t always be a moment for you to place the blame on someone else.. you will be the one at fault.. The one who betrayed another person.. The one who took the love, trust, and respect that they had for you for granted. Learning to forgive is important because it’s apart of the growing process. It’s what makes you a better person later in life. forgiveness is freedom. It’s letting go of what hurt you so that you won’t hurt someone else. Forgiveness is important because we’re human and we all make mistakes that we aren’t aware of at the time. Even if you aren’t the one who’s done wrong, let us spend more time acknowledging our hurt, but also placing ourselves in the shoes of the person who hurt us. It may not always be effective, but it will at least place us outside of our minds and open us into a new thinking space. Let us not be so quick to accept the role of “the victim”. It becomes an act that is tiring and not worth it in the end. Let’s not be the victim of an unfortunate circumstance anymore. Think outside of your box. It is that thinking that will allow us to become discouraged and focused on all of the negative things that have occurred rather than accepting our hurt, be willing to forgive, most importantly move forward in our life without any negativity trailing behind us. 

Things That I Wish

  • That unicorns were actually real. (mainly because I think of myself as a unicorn so I feel like they’d be my spirit animal somehow).
  • there was a book of all the dreams I’ve had since I was a little girl.
  • “Smell-a-vision” was a real thing. (because who wouldn’t want that right?)
  • We actually had the chance to go back in time at least once in our lives.
  • That I could actually read minds. (people seem to think I can anyway).
  • College was less expensive.
  • My attention span wasn’t so short (b/c right now I’m a mix between Dory and a baby squirrel).
  • That world peace was actually a thing. (the world seems as if it’s in shambles right now).
  • That I didn’t procrastinate as much as I do. ( True Life: I’ve procrastinated my whole life).
  • That I was more vocal about my feelings. ( I suck at it now).
  • I would’ve invested in my writing career earlier in life.
  • I didn’t forgive so easily.
  • I had a rich ancestor who left me a nice check.
  • That I was financially secure.
  • That birthday wishes actually came true. ( My childhood would’ve been more pleasant).

6 Month Update

image1

Hello Everyone! First off, let me apologize for taking a six month hiatus on my blog. So many things came into my life and distracted me from updating the way that I wanted to. I’m pretty sure many of you can relate. I’m trying my best to get back into blogging and increasing my writing skills not only for academic purposes but for my own recreational purposes. 6 months ago I had no idea that it took so much time and effort that I didn’t have and wasn’t really willing to give to devote to my blog. I was a senior in high school and a sophomore in college working on my Associates Degree (which I’ve obtained already) and I was just super busy and focused on getting ready to graduate and choose a college to attend in the fall. Now that the summer is slowly coming to an end, I’ve realized that it’s time for me to get back to what I love which is writing and documenting my life. My goals are still the same, they’ve just been shifted a bit. Over the next few months I hope to see growth with Lost Among The Lily Pads and everything else that I choose to invest my time in. Now let’s move on to this life update, so many things have  happened in the past six months that I’m not even sure where to start. So lets just start with school.

After so many months of uncertainty I am proud to say that I will be attending Georgia State University in the fall. I know that Spelman was my first choice, but unfortunately  I was not one of the lucky ladies who were accepted this year. I must admit that it was a lot to take in and accept, but I know that everything happens for a reason. I really think that Georgia State will be a good choice for me. I’ve always considered myself to be a small town girl with big city dreams. Atlanta may not be a “big city” to some people but it’s way more than what I’m used to it’s a pretty bold move for me, but at this point I’m thinking “Go hard, or go home.” I’ll only have two years left due to me completing my first two years of college during my Junior and Senior year of high school. I’m beyond excited about leaving next month and starting my new journey.

Change has been the only thing on my mind and with that thought, last month I decided to chop off all of my hair during my transition process. I’m not sure what got into me, but I was most definitely happy that it happened. For 11 months I was going through the struggle of dealing with my natural hair that was growing in along with the relaxed ends of my hair. I was unhappy, I was tired, and I knew I wasn’t being who I truly wanted to be because I knew I wanted a change, but I was afraid of what people might say. I got a pair of scissors one morning and I went crazy. The end result was something that I was more than happy about. I haven’t had a regret since then, but I most definitely feel free now. I was holding on to my hair because I thought that length mattered. My relaxed hair was not healthy anymore and it really served no purpose in my life. Now I’m a naturalista and I’m proud!

The lessons that I’ve learned in the past 6 months have been much needed. I needed something to wake me up and bring a change about me. Looking back at the person that I was then and the person that I’m becoming, I couldn’t be more proud of myself. Everyday is literally a learning experience for me. Letting go of old patterns, unhealthy relationships, and friends who meant me no good has made all the difference. Now that I’m single, I’m taking the chance to learn about myself and figure out how to be a better person and focus on what’s important to me.

Looking forward, I think that I have so many amazing opportunities headed my way. I want to continue to grow both as a person and as a writer. This time around I want to dedicate more time and effort towards my talents/passions. It’s easier said than done of course, but I know for sure that anything worth having is not going to come easy. So if it means that I have to take time away from other things that aren’t as important I am most definitely willing to do that. This is something that I have to do for me. Writing has always been my outlet and I feel like the more I share/release whats on my mind, the more freedom I feel. No more hiatus’, only productivity.

With love,

Teddy Smith.

 

 

Hello February

Look at what day it is! Already two months into the new year and I must say that everything has been great. At this point I feel like I’m learning to appreciate the little things that happen daily because months ago I was not in a good place, but boy have the tables turned! I mean I have a great group of friends, my love life is poppin’, my grades are great and I’m looking forward to great things in the near future.

I have saw a lot of people on social media say that January was only a trial month for them because it was horrible, but I feel the exact opposite. I mean feel as if everyday I’ve learned a little more or said more of how I felt and that has how I’ve wanted to be for a while now. Things are not perfect by far, but I am most definitely in a happy place , because I can look back and see that I could be worse off and that my life isn’t bad at all. When I look at things that I don’t have, it doesn’t even match up to the blessings that I have right now. It seems so small. I love the fact that daily, I’m surrounded by people who love me and care about my feelings and my success. For once in my life I’m being supported by someone who actually wants the best for me and who constantly push me to be better than I was yesterday.

 

2015 Reflection

I cannot think of a year that has been more emotionally challenging than 2015. It was as if everything that I wanted to prevent sort of happened to me anyway, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I’ve learned so much about myself, my friends, and the people around me this year. I went from having a group of friends to simply just hanging alone. From being in love, to letting go of someone who no longer deserved the love that I was willing to give. It took me long enough, but I’ve finally figured out that I have the right to be selfish at times and do whatever makes me happy. I am doing more harm than helping when I suppress who I really am just to fit the requirements of others. Love and accept me for who I am or get the hell out of my life. When I look back five years from now I really want to be able to say that I did everything as a teenager that I wanted to do. I think that life is way too short for me to just sit around and let all of these hidden opportunities pass me by. For so long I had the idea that everything that I wanted would just come my way and that if it didn’t then it really was not meant for me, but boy was I wrong. You really have to go after your dreams. If not then you’ll be living with so many regrets. In 2016 I just want to dedicate more time to my blog, my YouTube channel and my writing as a whole. I want to put out authentic material and track my growth as a young black woman in the world. I want to be someone who speaks and is heard by the people. I want to be heard and acknowledged as someone who matters. I matter and I refuse to let anyone tell me otherwise. I’m going to focus on graduating in May and also receiving my acceptance letter from Spelman in March. I’m not letting a minor setback stop me from going after the things that I want. I no longer care about the negative vibes that people give off. As long as you’re doing great they’ll always have something to say. That’s my motivation. To show people that I am more than what they think that I am. Lastly, I want to develop a stronger relationship with God as I head off into the real world and down the path of success. I pray that he continues to bless me and those around me. I pray for guidance and a peace of mind. I want 2016 to be the year of peace, blessings, and good health. If you are reading this I hope that your year is everything that you want it to be plus more. Much love,

Teddy Smith.

Hello December!

I can already smell the sugar cookies in the air! December is finally here and as you can tell, I’m excited! I mean it’s the last month of the year. It really has not hit me that I’m a senior. After January, it won’t be long until graduation is right around the corner. The thing that i’m looking forward to the most is receiving acceptance letters from Spelman, Agnes Scott, and the two other schools that I applied to. I won’t even be picky about Christmas if my acceptance letters come through! my birthday was just two days ago and I turned the big 1-8, but I’ve been feeling so weird ever since! I mean for once I felt like my day was just another day. I didn’t do anything special and I actually wasn’t upset about it. I know I’m blabbing all over the place, but I am currently in Macroeconomics and this is actually my least favorite class this semester. The end is near though! I’m excited for Christmas break. I really need time to myself just to reevaluate my life. I’m really trying my best to keep up with my blog, but I am always so busy. I promise to dedicate more time  especially since I have so much to say. I know it has the potential to be really good! I just need to put forth more time to get it there.

 

( This is a late post, sorry it was written on December 1st)

Forgive Thy Enemy?

Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

– Oscar Wilde

How is it that even Oscar Wilde knew exactly what to do so that those who prayed for his downfall would have no effect on his daily life? I must say, this quote is life a constant reminder for me. I spend so much time being so nonchalant about what my enemies do or say about me, but in actuality it feels so much better to just forgive. I have found that once I’ve forgiven someone who is not an important factor in my life anymore it becomes easier for me to wash my hands of the situation. I mean I no longer have to walk around thinking about what they did or said that hurt me. I see it as leaving the guilt for them to deal with, I mean that’s one less thing that I have to consume the much needed space in my brain. Am I the only one who feels this way? Is forgiving the enemy much harder than what most people think it is? If you really wanna think about it, look at forgiving your enemy as getting thee last laugh.What more can they do? What more can they say? YOU WON. You beat them in their on game and if you’re anything like me that’s a damn good feeling.

 

Reflection.

click.jpeg

This photo reminds me of my summer spent in Washington D.C. I mean coming from a small town in Georgia it isn’t every day that you see such commotion. You’ll be lucky to even see more than three cars pass by your house on a regular basis. I took a visit to the train station in DC and I had no idea that it would be so awakening. It was literally a mix between a mall and a bus station, and they even had an H&M so yeah it was pretty official there. When I look at this picture, not only does it take me back to that trip, but it also reminds me of where I want to be in the near future. I want to be that college blogger who sets out for travel by any means. It has always been my dream to just travel the world and see what it has to offer me… Wanderlust if you will. I want busy airports and train stations to be a normal thing for me, not something that I’m introduced to once a year if i’m lucky.

Hope.

Hope is the one thing in life that I always try to keep. In a world where so much negativity surrounds me, it’s always a constant reminded to just keep the hope and keep the faith, pray and everything will be alright. Even now as a senior in high school who is a full time college student, I always have to maintain hope especially when it comes to applying to colleges. My dream school is Spelman College, and I will not stop until I get there. Sometimes it really just seems as if I talk myself out of being worthy of an acceptance letter from Spelman, I mean I know i’ve worked hard throughout high school but what if I’m just not the one for them? That is where hope kicks in. I HOPE and PRAY that next month I will receive that blue packet in the mail that I want ever so badly. That will be the start of a new me. hope-sun

Who Am I? Why Am I Here?

12187787_1313349072028000_67828430077263324_nHello world! It’s Teddy here! Let me begin by saying that Teddy is not legal name (but it would be pretty cool if it were right?). My name is T’yunna Smith and I’m from a small city in the state of Georgia. I am currently a senior in high school and a sophomore in college (yes, my life is hella busy), and I am co-captain of my cheerleading squad. I am a Sagittarius and if you met me I’m pretty sure you could tell. I am here because I have a voice and I want it to be heard! I could have easily bought a new journal and wrote down every detail of my life, but I spent way too many years taking that route. I wanted to be bold now, so here I am. I would love to touch on topics from beauty and lifestyle to surviving in college. I just want to reach out to people who are at the same stage in life as me. I want people to see my journey. i know that I have something great in store for me in the future. I would love for people to see my growth from the beginning. I would love to connect with anyone who will support me along my journey with this blog. if remaining consistent with blogging over the next year, I would love to have accomplished my goal of being passionate about something and sticking to it.